Gerald Plumbly

DID I ever tell you the story about the stripper, if I may use such a vulgar word, being strangled by a boa constrictor on stage in Soho?

I don’t suppose I did, but funnily enough the recent death of Her Majesty the Queen has made me think of the chap at the centre of the story.

Gerald Plumbly, who himself passed away 12 years ago now, had a marvellous vet’s surgery below his flat in Wimpole Mews, Marylebone.

And although he never treated a corgi  he was appointed the chief vet to the late Elizabeth II’s horses at the Buckingham Palace stables.

Maybe you remember his wife Topsy Rayner, another vet, who passed away a bit before him.

Or perhaps you can picture Gerald parading around in his immaculate Rolls Royce – famously unpredictable at the wheel, though.

Maybe you shared a dram with him in his beloved Soho. And no doubt someone reading this will recall his undying love of cricket, playing for the Stoics, and manning their scoreboard into his 90s.

But I’m afraid it’s the serpent that will always be in my mind.

The story goes that, many, many years ago, he happened to be in one of Soho’s drinking dens when a go-go dancer found the boa constrictor around her neck was, well, very fond of constricting.

Amid the gasps, Gerald calmly walked onto the stage of the club, drawing the curtain as he did so, and proceeded to pull out his lighter and give the snake a shock it wouldn’t forget.

Upon raising the curtain, the girl was free to continue her routine.

Those who were there say he received a standing ovation and awarded of a year’s free membership to the club, although I’m afraid I’m sworn to secrecy about which venue it was that this all unfolded in.